So it turns out infants are smarter than I realised. Way smarter.
As my daughter approached the age of two, the vocabulary her and her friends could use and understand was literally growing on a daily basis. This came as a bit of a surprise, as I had kind of expected it all to take a bit longer. But as much as the growth of their language skills blew me away, what I was even more surprised by was the awareness and strategic thinking skills the kids had already developed. I knew my daughter understood a lot of what was happening around her, because we would have conversations about whatever was happening all the time, but I didn’t realise how well she could identify behaviour patterns in the world around her and make predictions until she started recognising when I was going for a run based on what clothes I was wearing. And she didn’t just use the understanding of causation to predict- she used it to attempt to become more effective in getting what she wanted. I had gotten used to being able to proactively shape a situation to make it easier to get her to do the things she didn’t like doing, but soon she could see through that. Life quickly became a constant game of chess, with my daughter thinking a few moves ahead and me trying to catch up. It was a challenge I wasn’t expecting, but not one that I resent. I certainly have no intention of raising a meek or submissive daughter (I like to blame my wife’s genes, as she is also a very determined person), so I just embrace it. It is also really exciting to be able to have interesting conversations with her and part of what makes parenting so endlessly entertaining. Sometimes I can only try to stifle a helpless laugh when she sees me coming and shuts it down early. It will no doubt get even tougher as she gets older and smarter. At least it will keep my mind active for years to come. Isn’t that meant to help fight dementia?
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Dad thoughtsI haven’t had much chance to write much over the last couple of weeks. This has largely been to do with the birth of my daughter, which has had a profound impact on my life. As a corollary of this, a fair amount of my thoughts and observations may shift to the new topic of parenthood. I’m not planning on stealing from Sonia Kruger’s playbook and use the phrase, “as a parent,’ to make claims with no factual basis, but parenthood is a complex and fascinating area so I will be making a few comments about my experience of it. Archives
October 2020
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